I remember as a kid thinking about who I'd become when I grew up. I had standards for myself, like never to smoke or get drunk. I promised myself that when I become a dad, I'd never hit my kids or lose control and scream at them.
I used to have fantasies about living in a tree house and driving everywhere on a dirt bike. Other times I'd imagine everyone in the world just disappeared. I'd crews the streets in any car I wanted. I would go into a gas-station and take all the bubble gum and ice cream I wanted. I had taken into consideration that I might one day get lonely, so I stipulated in my dreams that people were only temporarily gone.
As I got older, my dreams matured and altered with me. I started dreaming of being alone on this earth, but with the entire female population. For some mysterious reason the entire male population vanished, leaving me the only man on earth. Now I'm fantasizing about getting a fulfilling job and traveling.
Yep, times change, or more accurately, time changes me. I don't hang out with the same friends, I don't have the same views as I did when I was a kid, and I don't have the same standards.
I don't know what all this means... probably nothing. But I recognize it and am self-aware.
Sunday, March 21, 2010
The time lapses from cloudy and grey to sunny like May, and with many days comes the occasional rain. It floods the creeks and dams for weeks with washed up leaves and limbs. The bridge that burned seems trifling when nature takes its toll and fills back the hole. Like two magnates polar opposite, these two sides requite with earths deposit. A connection is made with sticks and rocks and stones and bones. These things are piled up from places unknown. It takes more work to keep from building up than to watch nature rebuild its own when left alone.