I don't know... I don't know anymore. When I start to get a grasp on what is going on, on what I'm doing here, where I'm suppose to be... things start to fall apart and everything changes. For the sake of sanity and everyone around me, I wish I knew.
I wish I knew me better. I wish I knew why I ruin what's good in my life. Is there really a problem or is it in my head? Why am I so scared to let something good happen?
My eyes are so heavy. Winter lays on top of me for now and I will try to sleep long. Time needs to pass. Spring will be here soon and I will take advantage to grow in the warm sun.
I'm just not the same... empty, disoriented, pessimistic, unmotivated, and unhappy. That's not who I am. That's never who I've been. What's happening to me? Why can't I figure out what's going on?!
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